Last day of 2009

Okay.. so today is the last day of 2009 and I feel… LONELY.
I know it sounds hella pathetic but I’m watching “Godzilla” while typing this now. My eyes are glued to the tv screen while my fingers are busy typing away.
Last year at this time, I was actually outside drinking with a bunch of friends. This year, I feel so lazy that I turned down invitations to go out. I was supposed to go over to Jaslyn’s place to be her companion while her husband is away for the night but it is too far away and my laziness make stay at home, staring at the tv screen and doing nothing else.
BAH. I’m craving dor ice cream but I guess all the grocery store have already closed. I might walk over to the gas station to grab something later on.

This post is meaningless.

The reason why I’m feeling kinda odd is because.. I feel that this year, time really passed by so fast that I lost track of it. In a year, I completed my specialist diploma studies and that feels kinda.. too quick. Jan 13th 2008 ; I was looking up at the lightings decorations hanging loose on the trees, one month ago, during November 2009, the same lightings were hanging on the exact location as well. The same ambience, the same lightings, the same air but the feelings that I felt now is so different. The mentality, the goals, the motives of living my life is now different. I’m struggling between finding a part time sales promoter job and a professional job. The latter definitely benefits me financially but.. holding a professional position literally means I have to act like an adult.

Yes. To sum up everything, I’m just afraid of growing up cos’ it makes me feel as thou I’m growing old. Growing up means acting like an adult. Not only physically but emotionally and psychologically. I don’t like duties, expectations, responsiblity etc.
TIME STOP MOVING PLEASE.