Fulfilling day

1) today was hella busy. Had 2 interviews, then I went to Starbucks to grab a frappé. Cheese bagel ain't available (just when I'm craving for it) Then I went for Teresa's graduation event which happens to be a psychology motivational talk. Then I went to watch 'The Green Hornet'.

2) The talk was really fun! Went around meeting new people. That speaker dude talked about Sigmund Freud's Id, ego, superego, unconscious mind etc. We discussed about our opposite gender's traits. It gave me the urge to go back to study Psychology again.

3) GV Gold Class is really high class. Seats were damn spacious and comfy. Quite similar to business class airline seats. The loo is of a 6 stars hotel's standard. The service staffs are really polite and their attire looked smart. All these for the price of $36.

4) I used to think Jay Chou is overrated but after watching the movie, my opinion of him changed. I still don't think highly of him but at least he is average to me now.

5) Jay Chou's english gave me major headaches. I was tryna figure out what he's saying then I thought I could read the subtitles but alas, it's mando and it will take ages for me to finish reading a sentence (that's too much efforts and needs lotsa concentration)

6) Smoked at least 4 sticks of ciggs. It sucks to have smoker friends who smoke every 30 mins - 60 mins. Especially when they offer you everytime they smoke and you have no willpower to reject cos' you're a real sucker for ciggs and you have been clean for 21 days and the urge is back and you're not insane enough to say 'no'. Just tryna justify myself, period.

7) Learnt about the reason why she ran away without contacting us after she cheated us of our $$. She asked me to lie to the cabbie that I've no cash / atm cards with me and I'm renting an apartment so there's no way that I can get money from my folks. It took me so much effort to convince her that is not the way how things work. The cabbie worked hard during the night to earn , he deserves his hard earned money. It is our fault for going home late during ungodly hours thus having to pay twice the fare. That she is a mom and she has to be responsible, she can't be teaching her daughter the wrong things.
She told me that she'd rather spend the money on other things. The thing is, I wish I could spend it on other things instead too. Such as food, I'm such a glutton, you think I'd rather spend the $ on cab fares instead of food? You think I don't feel the pinch? I'm not gonna do something which I think is morally wrong. My conscience bugs me, especially when I have nothing and held on tightly to the beliefs of integrity.
Is that the reason why she cheated us of our money? Because she isn't responsible and she'd rather spend the money that should be used to pay her debts on something else? Because it never once bug her or makes her feel guilty?

I'm utterly disappointed.. I thought she have already changed. I thought her punishments were enough, infact overwhelmingly depressing. But the truth is, a leopard can never changes its spots. They can only hide it momentarily to mask the truth.

8) I'm actually quite vexed right now. Should I make a clean break? But I know I can't.. I chose to meet her in the first place despite knowing what it's gonna be like. I'm a black-or-white person - it's either I forget about the debt or went on pursuing it. I chose the former cos' the latter is gonna take up so much more effort. Now I know I can turn away from her. I don't like what she is doing, I can't respect what her decisions are because they are foolish , irrational and morally incorrect but I can't change her perspectives either.

9) I'm gonna help out at my mom's tmr. It has been 2 days since I last help her out.

10) Hopefully, I can go starbucks and revise btt and get prep-ed for BTT trial test on Saturday and I hope to go clubbing in the night. Sunday's afternoon = BTT TRIAL TEST.

PEACE OUT.